I remember sending some really embarrassing cards back in the day - one asking: "Do you remember when I rolled my eyes at you ...and you picked them up and rolled them right back?" Another showed a big yellow duck on the cover and on the inside proclaimed: "I'm quackers about you!"
Feel free to groan, I'm sure the recipients did. They never asked me out anyway.
Which reminds me of my favourite joke: How do you turn a duck into a soul singer?
Put him in the microwave until his bill withers (he's Bill Withers, d'you see?). Thanks to Tony Blackburn for that one! (Radio London, circa 1984)
And No.2 liked a little ditty we re-discovered when we were clearing out his old nursery rhyme cd's for the Blue Peter appeal -
Hey diddle diddle
the cat had a piddle
all over the dining room floor
The little dog?
He didn't find it funny at all
He got a smack on the paw