Holiday Snaps!

We previously stayed at Old Hall Farm a few years ago, before owners Lucy and John converted their barns - and I've been trying to get booked in again ever since but they were always full! Finally managed it this year, so here's a snapshot of the week.

You could live more than comfortably in the cottage, it had everthing you needed - this was where hubby treated us to a full cooked brekkie - every morning we hadn't forgotten the eggs; 90p a half dozen from Archie's (John and Lucy's son) own hens. They had home made ice cream available too!

The Hobbit chills out in our lovely cottage. Adamant that he never had his feet on the table he was ...

The Play Barn: Scene of three memorable victories over Matt, seen here practising in vain to beat his mummy.

We found the local Indian Restaurant, hurrah! I'm holding a masterpiece of creation, my speciality, although they laugh at me: Take one poppadom, sprinkle with raitha sauce, add chopped tomato and onion, then drizzle with mango chutney. What's wrong with that?

Raffia elephants at the Africa Alive! experience near Lowestoft. No real ones, but rhinos and lions and the cutest otters you ever did see. Will figure out if I can get the bit of video on here of them - but don't hold your breath, it's taken me four days to load some photos ...

The putting green on Southwold sea front - you see now why I did so badly: Windy day + no hair clip = where's the flag?

This is The Old Dairy, where we actually stayed - look closely and you can see an imp hiding behind a big rubber ring!

If you check out the link at the top, you'll find a picture of the swimming pool, the main reason we wanted to go again - we had it to ourselves every time we wanted it. Even though it is hired out privately for a couple of hours a day, I can't recommend the Old Hall Cottages highly enough as a base for a lovely family holiday.

3BT: Holiday Fun

The amazing maize maze: Before we went, Matt told The Hobbit: "It's a bit like the Harry Potter maze. But without the death stuff. And the cup. And the magic."

I taught Matt how to play a torpedo game in the amusement arcade. Me, the expert - I won 4 tickets, he won 126.

We invented a new game 'Squennis'. In the astroturf playbarn, the five a side goals were put in the middle and the tennis balls were allowed off the wall, posts, crossbar, anywhere. I'm still quite bruised, actually.

3BT: Holiday Fun

Playing ‘Pictionary’ – I draw a horse in the building horses live in and the Hobbit says: “Horse hut!” Horse hut, I ask you – he got the hang of it eventually and we won.

Shot a personal best 61 on an 18 hole ... putting green. Tied with Matt. Who’s embarrassed? I’m not embarrassed – he plays a lot more than I do!

Sitting in one of those huge rubber rings in the swimming pool is so relaxing – specially post swim, at the side of the pool. I think I’ll design and patent an alternative to the deck chair; I could have quite happily stayed there all day.

Holiday Bingo

Brad's first time in a proper bingo game, believe it or not and he was incredulous at the amount of player participation. I knew a few of the sayings “66, clickety click” Cue everyone clicking their fingers. “Number 4, knock on the door.” Knuckles on the tables. “3 and 5 ...” “Aye Aye chicken pie!” they all shouted. Eh? What's all that about? Legs 11 we knew – everyone wolf whistles; Kelly's Eye “Spit in it!” they shout. “Thank you spitters!” replies the caller. There's the usual “Two little ducks, 22” (Everybody quacks), two fat ladies has been replaced with two 'wobblers', even holiday camps having succumbed to the pc brigade. There were gasps and mutterings when a little boy calling out the numbers for the kids game reverted to 'two rotundly challenged persons'. Mostly people sniggering, of course. The Entertainments officer quickly stepped in when a single wobbler turned up. In the end, I was woo-wooing and tapping to “59, Brighton Line” just to wind Brad up. No sense of occasion, teenagers.

3bt Holiday memories

Food – lovely cherry tomatoes, we needed to buy a bigger box as they dont normally go that quickly - cream teas - The Rising Sun pub, Bashley, on the B3098. A perfect place for kids, reasonably priced and very tasty.

The boys clearing up - washing and drying!!! And not just because I had a headache. Brad even ran the hoover over the caravan.

It's hazy but I can see the Needles from Highcliffe, the one at the front with the lighthouse looks like a swan heading out to sea with a couple of youngsters in tow. Skimming stones in the sea.

Holiday competitions

Won 'Best Party Mum' one night during Sammy the Seahorse's party dances - and have a certificate to prove it! I'd love to say Matt was so proud * basks in the reflected embarrassment of 8 year old*. The song we were dancing to was called 'Chocolatte' - the other mums didn't stand a chance!

It took me back to my childhood holiday camp years. My Dad and my brother used to win anything target related – darts, golf etc. Me and mum won anything swimming related.

For years one or other of us won the Fancy Hats competition with a packet of Ex-Lax pinned to a sun visor. It's a song, an oldie from the sixties I think, possibly Matt Monroe. Got it yet? No? Give in? Ok, it's called 'Softly as I Leave You.' No-one ever got it, they always went for the obvious – Please Release Me!

The Presentation night at the end of the week was a real family affair. We must have been hated by other holidaycampers. I even won Miss Sinah Warren one week – not because I was prettier – it was 1981;big hair and a bagful of slap was all that was needed, trust me.

Holiday - the talent show!

Is it just me or is there something slightly disturbing about 11 year old girls draping themselves over chairs in a 'dance' routine in skimpy outfits? Thankfully, the rest were just the usual cringeworthy bad singing - and a young girl dancing the rumba, accompanied on vocal by a little boy, who wasn't bad, to be honest. You'd think I would have liked that, but Professional Mum was partnering daughter and I didn't think having mum on the floor talking you through the performance was quite in the spirit of an under 10's talent show. Just my opinion of course. They didn't win.

3bt Holiday 2: The things they say and those best left unsaid

An elderly lady in front in the queue for the carvery sounded just like Eric Idle as Brian's mum in 'Life of Brian'. We fully expected to hear “He's not the Messiah he's a very naughty boy!” any second. Similarly, in the 'Shout Out' bit for the kids in the ballroom, they were asked what their favourite film was. In amongst the calls of 'High School Musical' (very popular) and 'Digby, the Biggest Dog in the World' (Confused looks from anyone under the age of forty) we held our breath in case ours yelled out “Life of Brian!”

Driving past a turning called 'The Meadow' we all do our best 'Bambi' impression. (You'll need to have seen the film!)

An armoured vehicle was driving down New Milton High Street! Soldiers in full gear poking out the top of it. One wag shouts: "We're being invaded! I surrender!"

A boy running past us after a bunch of others, with what looked like a handful of wood chips: "I don't know what you're doing but I wanna join in!”

Hi Di Hi Campers: Holiday 3bt

We went to Weymouth for the day – the scenic route. Which rapidly became 'Retail parks I have known and could really have done without meeting, thanks.' A bit of a funfair, karting and amusements, an Italian meal and finally, fireworks on the open water before hubby began marching us back to the one big car park in Weymouth – and then back the other way after I asked the kind lady in Tescos where the car park actually was.

Talking of apt names, as I did in the previous post, the Hampshire colloquialism for a seagull is 'Shitehawk'.

Matt, in the soft play area. Dad asked: "You all right, son?"
"The girls keep chasing me with the balls, Dad."
"Do you want to come out?"
"No." He reappeared a little later: "It's alright Dad, they haven't caught me yet!"
At what age do the boys start chasing the girls?