... improbable TV listings.
Sunday 3rd January
3.00pm: David Attenborough's Life
Ecologists, palaeontologists and conservationists gather to celebrate their spiritual leader and God of Man.
3.30pm: Antiques Stage Show
Members of the public challenge Fiona Bruce to utilize their old junk in a tableau homage to Broadway.
4.00pm: "Don't You Know Who I Am?"
The ancestry programme moves to London's West End, as a minor celebrity tries to charm bouncers with their best drunken dialogue and fanny/pecker flashing skills. Spin off show "WhoThe F**k Do They Think They Are?" follows on BBCITV4 at 3.00am.