Alternative opening lines from great books ...
Mr and Mrs Dursley, of number four, Privet Drive, were proud to say they were perfectly normal, thank you very much, and their swinging parties were considered to be the best in the neighbourhood.
When Mr. Bilbo Baggins if Bag End announced that he would shortly be celebrating his eleventy-first birthday with a party of special magnificence, there was much muttering and eye rolling at what the old codger had in mind this time.
Lyra and her Daemon moved through the darkening hall, taking care to keep to one side, out of sight of the Britain's Got Talent judges, lest they were accidentally sent through to the final as the next Kate and Gin.
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